Fellow Helldivers 2 players, I’m begging you to stop calling the extraction shuttle early

Helldivers posing

I am, when all’s said and done, quite a lazy man. I like naps, usually forget to take the bins out, and frequently put off making dinner until about 9 pm. But I’m a very diligent Helldiver. The propaganda machine back at Super Earth has really had an impact on me, and now I can’t help but try my hardest to spread managed democracy throughout the galaxy. Helldivers 2 has made me a bootlicker.

It’s very hard to do this very important work, however, when I’ve only got one ride off the planet, and the pilot doesn’t care that there are more bug nests and automaton outposts left standing. Once that shuttle leaves, the mission is over, whether I’m safely inside it or not. 

(Image credit: Arrowhead Game Studios)

Right after launch, my fellow Helldivers seemed pretty keen to clean up during every mission. It was glorious victory after glorious victory. But now? Everyone seems to be in a rush to get back to the ship. Maybe there’s a birthday party about to kick off and they don’t want to miss out on the cake. I get it. Cake is great. But medals are also great, and I want more of them.



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